Thursday, June 26, 2008

Don't Pet the Rabbit...and Other Such Nonsense

To enter into friendship with me is to enter into a kind of quasi wonderland in that you never know just what kind of nonsense you might be getting yourself into...or trying to get yourself out of.

Unfortunately strangers have no forewarning of my shenanigans and therefore often times find me quite strange. Take yesterday for example. I had to take the rabbit to Jeremy's clinic at three to hand her over to her new owners. And because I am annoyingly punctual, I was an hour early to drop her off. I didn't know what do do with myself for an hour; I couldn't take the rabbit into the clinic, and I couldn't leave it in the car. It was nearly 100 degrees outside.

So I went shopping. I put the rabbit in my purse and put the purse in the cart in the store, which was kind of like a T.J Maxx. And just because many things work out serendipitously for me, that waskally wabbit just stuck it's little paws and nose out the front of the bag and hung out the whole time Ellie and I looked around the store. And NO ONE noticed.

Eventually I had to go to the restroom, so I grabbed the bag full 'o rabbit and Ellie and went into a stall. Ellie had been eating a sucker and her hands were incredibly sticky along with her face and shirt. There was actually a line of people waiting to use the stalls and so I was hurrying; in the meantime Ellie reaches down and tried to pull the rabbit out of the bag and I'm all, no honey don't pet your bunny when you're hands are all dirty like that, she'll get sticky. Awwww dang it, now you've got hair all over your hands! And there I am just carrying on like a fool not thinking about the dozen other people out there listening to me.

When we exited the stall to wash our hands, a woman leaned over to me and whispered with a knowing smile, "I know, my daughter always tries to touch, and I quote here, "her parts" with dirty hands too." At that point I decided that it would be harder to explain the truth than to just nod and shrug as if to say, "eh, waddayagunna do? Kids these days".

Note to self: NEVER give the kid a blue sucker whilst she is wearing white...ever...again. She looked like she had gone on a smurf massacre. WHAT THE SMURF IS GOING ON HERE?!!


Krista said...

Ahah! A smurf massacre! What a hilarious thought...

I am going to work in "what the smurf?!" into a conversation today.

Good luck with the move! DC is a wonderful city. We go to DC often from the Philly 'burbs, and it's such a lovely city to get around in.

Jillian said...

Awesome! I think you should try to substitute every curse word for the word smurf just for today.

You'll be amazed at how smurfing funny it is.