So as I was trying to figure out a way to stay at home and still contribute to the family finances, I came across an article about a teenage girl who had formed a company worth a million dollars just by making layouts for Myspace pages. And then a light bulb went off in my head. The dilettante in me said: You could write a blog for other Mothers like you and talk about the things that affect us, make us cry, make us laugh, and maybe you could make money doing it. And then after a few clicks of the mouse I discovered that about a million other Mothers had the same idea. Damn, too late once again!
It was in my search that I came across this blog, which I read every day and laugh at almost every day. And this blog which led me to my long lost hurricane neighbor and this blog which I read almost every day and also makes me laugh. Through the course of writing here I feel like I have formed a kind of friendship with people that regularly comment or email me even though we have never personally met. And that's exactly what I was hoping for. Well, that and a million dollars. But alas, I have given up the hope to profit financially from this venture. And that's OK. The human connections are well worth it alone.
In the reading of the other blogs I just mentioned, I discovered something called Blogher, which I guess is a network for all of these women to connect, learn, and grow. I really couldn't tell you. I'm too busy trying not to let the house burn down. Over the past couple of days there has been some drama and rumblings on the internet about an incident that happened at the Blogher conference in San Francisco recently between her and her. I'm not going to lie and say I didn't read up on it. I did. And in the course of doing so I found some very ugly and hateful things being said about both sides. And it made me take a step back and think.
I realized that it is so easy to get caught up in this world just like Megan said, and the world that really doesn't even exist can somehow cloud our perception of the people behind it who are real, with real feelings. It made me very sad. Especially sad to realize that even the women who should be steadfast in their support of each other can act catty and childish like so many of the comments and posts I read were proof of.
After saying all of that, my point really is this. What I read yesterday and today formed the head of a giant, nasty pimple of feelings that have been brewing in me for awhile now. In the process of trying to form connections outside of my home and through a craft that I enjoy, I have neglected to strengthen the connections that are right in front of me. I think I may spend way too much time in front of the computer. And not only is this likely causing some kind of retinal dysplasia; I am missing precious moments of life with my Husband and child. Moments that can never be relived.
No, I'm not going away. I will continue to update you on recent shenanigans, probably daily. But I am making a personal vow to step away from this piece of hardware for all but one hour a day. So, I better come prepared and with fingers of lightning speed when I do come. I'm gettin dirty folks. I'm going to be a coloring, swinging, Elmo watching, bike riding, peanut butter and jelly in little heart shapes making, husband worshipping fool. And that's the way it should be.
Right now there is a little girl with big green eyes asking me to share some "hot coffee" out of blue plastic teacups in front of a huge play kitchen. And I couldn't think of anything that would make me happier.