In the early morning hours after Jeremy had left for work, I dreamed that I was humping Jack's back. Jack is Jeremy's very large dog for those of you who may not know. So, there we were and I was going at it with all the frenzy of a puppy when in my dream I heard a buzz saw. This startled me and I woke up to find myself spooning Jack in our bed and him growling at me. It was then that I realized that perhaps the incident had been more than a dream. I am not Madonna and bestiality does not appeal to me, so this realization created a strong urge to toss my cookies. I HUMPED MY DOG'S BACK. How many people can say that they've unconsciously done that? Believe me, it's never been on my to do list, but I am now sharing it with you. For closure.
I've finally reached the point where I can laugh about it, but it took awhile. As for the ungrateful dog, well, I kicked him out and from now on my pillow will have to be on the receiving end of my REM affections. At least the pillow won't growl at me.
Oh, and I KNOW he's into me even if he rejected my advances because he's ALWAYS trying to make out with me after I eat garlic and every time I take a shower he just stares and stares.