Well Universe, it has happened again. My face exploded. Along with the rest of my upper body. Hard as I have tried this time to avoid the pitfalls and gluttony of my last pregnancy, it is just not in the cards for me to remain "unpuffy". The only deflated thing here is my ego.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
When I lived in Mississippi I met a wonderful person named Neil Ladner. Neil is an amazing photographer and while any one of his photos are worthy of being featured in a gallery; I recently saw a collection that I thought some of you, Dear Readers, might particularly enjoy.
And here for your viewing pleasure is just a sampling of his beautiful work. These photos capture the essence of what this part of the city is. It's beauty, grit, charm, and eccentric personality are almost tangible. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.
Yeah. Nice, huh?
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
My Mother got pregnant with me when she was 21 and from the way she talks about it she was so physically capable at that age to bear children she may as well have been a trapeze artist. She frequently made mention to me that the five year difference between my brother and I had a huge impact on her body physically. When I became pregnant with Ellie I was the same age that she was when she became pregnant with my brother. And I thought that was hard. I attributed all my physical woes to the copious amounts of lard I packed onto my body. And to be truthful, outside of the chest clutching heartburn and hangover like morning sickness of the first few months, this time has been much easier on my body. Until now.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Last night my brother called to tell me that he and my Mother had heard a song that reminded them of me. I asked him what song it was and after a long pause in which he had to go look it up and call me back, I learned that it was What's Up by The Four Non Blondes. It's ironic that I enjoyed that song so much because at that time, and I suppose even now to some degree, I resemble the typical blonde. Outwardly anyway. My departure from bubblegum pop and into this music and song in particular signaled the beginning of a long and dark period of self discovery in my life that would ultimately end with my tearful homecoming after Katrina. I've discovered enough about myself at this point that I realize there are much more fascinating things to discover. Self is way overrated.
Posted by Jillian at 5:31 PM
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Elsbeth has always been early on her vocabulary and speaking skills, but since turning two her ability to reason and communicate that reasoning to me has just blown me away. It is so entertaining that I can spend a good deal of time just talking to her about things and asking her questions to see what her astonishing little mind will come up with.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
When I was a girl we spent many weekend afternoons driving aimlessly around in the family vehicle. I relished these times because we never knew where they would find us. Often times we would look at houses, as my parents life long hobby has been renovating older homes. My brother and I would always be most impressed with the biggest homes we could find, extolling their palatial like virtues while my Mother responded with, yeah, but WHO'S going to clean a house like that? Well when you're 10, cleaning isn't the first thing that comes to mind when picking out your dream home. I had fanciful visions of football field sized games of hide and seek in the dark.
Look at the face above. You would think it easy to love a mug like that. But in reality, there is not much happening behind those eyes other than intermittent messages of: DUUUUUUHHHHH! Sunday I returned home from church to find Jack Johnson covered in feathers and trailing a whirlwind of feathers behind him. My heart sank and I knew instantly what he had done. He ate through our down comforter. Of all the small things in life that give me pleasure, my down comforter is at the top of the list. I wanted to chop off his head right then and there, and I think my hormonal rage would have compelled me to do so if it weren't for Ellie begging clemency for his black, black soul. Every day since then I have risen to find he has decapitated one of her stuffed animals or gotten into the garbage. He has always been annoying, but never anything like this.
This is a half gallon of obviously spoiled goat milk. Keep in mind that the trash can is about two feet from the fridge. The distance to the counter where I found this milk is about three times that long. This is supposed to say: STAY AWAY (it's a good thing he chose to pursue dentistry and not English...Whew)
And just because the first warning wasn't enough, the next side of the bottle exclaimed this: YUK! Yes, we can all see that the milk is SO spoiled that it has actually seperated and formed two layers in the bottle. YUK indeed!
And perhaps because there was still one empty side and his impeccable sense of proportion compelled him to also fill it in, he indulged us with this gem:
Sometimes all I can do is laugh.
This has become my life. A nightly orgy of zoo animals and strawberry scented bubbles in the tub, a Dora the explorer potty seat, and a pink step stool used in the aiding and abetting of Elsbeth's sporadic ransacking of my makeup. Would I change anything? Well, maybe some money for a maid would be nice, but otherwise, nope, not a thing.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Well, I made it past the halfway point with no drama or catastrophe occurring. As far as pregnancies go, this one is very different from my experience carrying Elsbeth. Mainly, my stomach isn't lodged somewhere right under my boobs. It fell about a foot and a half from last time (although sadly, that hasn't eased my heartburn in the slightest...nor my cravings for jalapenos) and it almost seems like my belly button is further down than last time. It's strange too because I've always had a relatively flat stomach, and now it seems as if any weight I have gained has gone directly into forming a chubby circle of flubber around my waist. I now have four breasts, one set under my chin and the other, newer set on my lower back. They resemble man boobs in a very unattractive way and I'm considering buying them a bra.
Now for the boo-twah. It is certainly more than two handfuls, and feels something like cold jello, but lemme just tell you: it can deflect snowballs, instantly deal with half-shut car doors, and makes an excellent seat for a two year old. I like to measure it in heads, and it looks to be three heads wide at this point. In the infamous words of Sir Mix Alot: Red beans and rice didn't miss this!